I watch TV a lot. Usually with my PDA on and editing, but yeah, a lot. I am a Law and Order fanatic. I don't care which one, hit me with it. Love it. I'm nursing a crush on the FBI psychologist on SVU. But I digress. My point? The commercials. Advertising agencies need to get a frigging clue. It has reached the point where I WON'T buy stuff because the commerical is SO FRICKING STUPID. And they're relying on techniques that should have died ages ago. Here is my comprehensive list of commercial styles that should just go straight to hell. 1. The situation where people (or cartoon characters) do ridiculous and sometimes dangerous things in order to get an item. They're missing a simple logical connection: The commercial is intended to let you know of a product's existence. So if the product is readily available, WHY THE HELL DON'T THEY GO BUY THEIR OWN instead of walking over hot coals, running a marathon, or pouring sugar in their mother's gas tank? A good example as those stupid Arbor Mist commercials for their cheap-ass wine. I love the stuff, actually. Two women sitting at a table with their bottle of wine. The men are making a statue of Michelangelo's David out of Spam. The smarmy twits remark, "Oh, that doesn't deserve an Arbor Mist." What is stopping these guys from saying, "Screw you, bitch, we're going to the bar and having a Guiness. We didn't want your nasty girl-drink anyway."? NOTHING. Stupid. Nobody would do that crap. Give the men their wine, give the rabbit his damned Trix, you selfish jerks. Or have them show God-given logic and get their own. Which brings me to number two: 2. One sex, age or otherwise is superior to another. I am SICK of commercials where kids are smartass little knowitalls and the parents are clueless bumbling geeks. Like parenting isn't hard enough without kids basically being told it's ok to smart off to adults as long as you're cute about it? And it doesn't stop there. You have the smart wife/idiot husband and vice-versa. Lose it. We do not need any more weaponry in the battle of the sexes. 3. Feminine Hygiene Products. For crying out loud. Those of us who need the products know where to find them. Nobody else needs to hear about it. Or wants to. I do not want to know about anyone else's burning, itching or irritation. I really am not interested in how heavy someone's flow is or how many nice panties they ruined. And I'm really not interested in what someone's privates smell like. Especially when they drag hubby into it. Do you think hubby wants the world to know his wife needs to lube up before they do it? Not doing his job, eh? Does the world WANT to know? HELLS NO. 4. Reality check. Nobody carries a SEALED BRANDNEW PACKAGE of something around just in case a friend asks them for help. What you have is a raggedy item that's been banged around in a purse. If it's sealed, they don't actually USE it, and that gives the impression that it SUCKS. And someone is supposedly drinking out of a full drink through a straw, yet it makes that rattley straw sound that you only get when it's almost empty. DUH. Check your facts and get it right. Now, what I like...I like humor. I like cool imagery, like the sports ones for Nike, and Adidas. I am fine with suspension of disbelief as long as it's not STUPID or cliche. And I like to know what the damned product does. Why is that so damned hard? Stop insulting our intelligence, and that of the companies that pay you to come up with their advertising, and get a clue.

hah...yes...I secretly want to work for SNL but only writing mock commercials.

For example...female, menstruating...isn't going to let a pad get between her and her man...LOL...I would revisualize with her then trying to turn over and hug Marty Brodeur (hocky goalie) in full gear.

"I'm nursing a crush on the FBI psychologist"

mmm...the nice little Asian dude? Yeah...cute, clean, caring and the character probably has an IQ of 180. Wouldn't mind a little couch time with him.

W(hen)TF are you getting more visitors here. I'm lonely.

Finally, you know what...for a second I forgot I was reading your journal and thought I was on Jaynie's.

Yes, the Asian guy. Bigtime crush. I love smart men.

Girl,I think you're the only one who reads mine..LOL. My blog has a taint, I guess.

I was a "Law and Order" fan until they got rid of Elisabeth Rohm. (And the way they did it was idiotic. We find out she's a lesbian, but they made NO mention of it before we find out.) Once they got rid of Elisabeth, I stopped watching. People complained that she couldn't act. :( I thought she did fine.

For me, it's all about the characters. That's why I only like the original CSI--the offshoot characters weren't as cool.